- LINK (Chainlink)
- $12.19: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Chainlink: Still here, still plugging away. It’s like that reliable friend who never gets invited to the party but always ends up bailing you out afterwards.
- APT (Aptos)
- $8.26: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Aptos is up 5% today? Must be a glitch. Someone tell u/lpqvla0 to check his portfolio again.
- BTC (Bitcoin)
- $63917.46: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Bitcoin is like that ex who keeps popping up on your social media feed, bragging about their new life choices. Sure, it’s doing its thing, but do we really need the constant reminders?
- SHIB (Shiba Inu)
- $0.00: ⭐⭐
- Shiba Inu is up 25% this week? Don’t get too excited, it’s still basically internet dust.
- UNI (Uniswap)
- $7.77: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Uniswap - It’s like that one friend who swears they’re going to be a DJ but can barely operate Spotify.
Remember that time some dude on WallStreetBets turned into a ‘millionaire’ because of a stock split glitch? Yeah, feels a bit like that here in crypto land. Today’s data dump from the land of 1B coins is giving us major ‘Should I buy a MacBook Air or 5,000 Bitcoins?’ vibes (spoiler alert: Bitcoin would’ve been the better choice).
| Logo | 30D Change | 24H Change | Circulating | Price $ | Diluted Cap $ | Cap # | Symbol | Name | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 0 |  |
 |
+5% | 8.26 | 9.24B | 27 | APT | Aptos | |
| 1 |  |
 |
+3% | 7.77 | 7.77B | 23 | UNI | Uniswap | |
| 2 |  |
 |
+3% | 5.51 | 6.68B | 17 | NEAR | NEAR Protocol | |
| 3 |  |
 |
+2% | 29% | 1.86 | 7.99B | 41 | OP | Optimism |
| 4 |  |
 |
+2% | 56% | 28.87 | 20.7B | 12 | AVAX | Avalanche |
| 5 |  |
 |
+2% | 89% | 68.38 | 5.74B | 21 | LTC | Litecoin |
| 6 |  |
 |
+2% | 42.18 | 12.7B | 38 | OKB | OKB | |
| 7 |  |
 |
+1% | 157.2 | 92.1B | 5 | SOL | Solana | |
| 8 |  |
 |
+1% | 2637.64 | 317B | 2 | ETH | Ethereum | |
| 9 |  |
 |
+1% | 12.19 | 12.2B | 14 | LINK | Chainlink | |
| 10 |  |
 |
+1% | 52% | 0.63 | 3.94B | 47 | MNT | Mantle |
| 11 |  |
 |
+1% | 1.31 | 1.31B | 63 | LDO | Lido DAO | |
| 12 |  |
 |
+1% | 579.36 | 84.5B | 4 | BNB | BNB | |
| 13 |  |
 |
+1% | 2635.56 | 25.9B | 9673 | stETH | Lido Staked ETH | |
| 14 |  |
 |
+1% | 5.84 | 29.8B | 9 | TON | Toncoin | |
| 15 |  |
 |
+1% | 0.16 | 13.6B | 10 | TRX | TRON | |
| 16 |  |
 |
+1% | 154.42 | 2.85B | 34 | XMR | Monero | |
| 17 |  |
 |
+1% | 6 | 5.91B | 18 | LEO | UNUS SED LEO | |
| 18 |  |
 |
+1% | 56% | 0.63 | 63.3B | 6 | XRP | XRP |
| 19 |  |
 |
+1% | 0 | 10.9B | 13 | SHIB | Shiba Inu | |
| 20 |  |
 |
0.16 | 13.7B | 9674 | WTRX | Wrapped TRON | ||
| 21 |  |
 |
0.09 | 2.56B | 43 | CRO | Cronos | ||
| 22 |  |
 |
94% | 344.3 | 7.23B | 15 | BCH | Bitcoin Cash | |
| 23 |  |
 |
9.28 | 4.86B | 24 | ICP | Internet Computer | ||
| 24 |  |
 |
63905.9 | 4.17B | 9680 | BTCB | Bitcoin BEP2 | ||
| 25 |  |
 |
77% | 0.39 | 17.3B | 11 | ADA | Cardano | |
| 26 |  |
 |
0.63 | 6.26B | 44 | ARB | Arbitrum | ||
| 27 |  |
 |
4.88 | 1.91B | 49 | ATOM | Cosmos | ||
| 28 |  |
 |
94% | 63917.5 | 1.34T | 1 | BTC | Bitcoin |
So, is the crypto market a dumpster fire or a golden opportunity? Honestly, it’s anyone’s guess. Just remember, if you’re not laughing, you’re probably doing it wrong. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to buy some Bitcoin with the spare change I found in my couch cushions. Who knows, maybe I’ll be laughing all the way to the moon…or at least to the bank to pay off my credit card debt.