• LINK (Chainlink)
  • $10.79: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
  • Down 2% this week, but hey, at least it’s not down 80% like some of those other sh*tcoins we’ve seen. Maybe those Robinhood cowboys should have YOLO’d into LINK instead? Just a thought. 😜
• BTC (Bitcoin)
  • $62183.84: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
  • The granddaddy of crypto is holding relatively steady, like a stoic grandpa at a rave. It’s seen worse, that’s for sure. Maybe it’s time to call your financial advisor and ask if they’ve heard of this whole “Bitcoin” thing yet. They’ve probably been living under a rock. 👵
• SOL (Solana)
  • $143.05: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
  • Solana is down this week, but hey, at least it’s not down as much as my dating life after mentioning I’m into crypto. Ouch. 😭
• CRO (Cronos)
  • $0.08: ⭐⭐
  • Cronos is down bad this week. Like, really bad. Maybe they should change their name to “Chronos” and try their luck as a time travel token? Because going back in time to before they invested is probably the only way anyone is making money off this thing right now. Time to deploy the sad trombone. 😩
• TON (Toncoin)
  • $5.21: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
  • Toncoin is holding its own this week, proving that sometimes, even in the wild west of crypto, a coin with a name that sounds like a Soviet-era truck can still pump. 🤷‍♂️

The crypto streets are paved with more red than a Valentine’s Day massacre, and even the Oracle of Omaha himself, Warren Buffett, is probably laughing his way to the bank with his giant pile of cash. He’s been dumping stocks like they’re going out of style, opting for the stability of short-term treasuries over the volatile world of stonks and, dare we say, crypto. Maybe he’s onto something… 🤔

Speaking of things going down faster than a Robinhood trader on payday, LINK (Chainlink) is taking a beating this week, down 2% over the past 7 days. Looks like those Robinhood call buyers who piled in after seeing an ad for “new features” might be feeling a little buyer’s remorse right now. Remember folks, buying calls based on an ad is about as sound a financial strategy as trusting a Nigerian prince with your bank account details. Just sayin'.

	Logo	30D Change	24H Change	Circulating	Price $	Diluted Cap $	Cap #	Symbol	Name
0			-2%	77%	0.34	15.5B	11	ADA	Cardano
1			-2%		4.89	5.93B	17	NEAR	NEAR Protocol
2			-2%		10.79	10.8B	14	LINK	Chainlink
3			-1%	93%	0.02	1.95B	48	VET	VeChain
4			-1%		3.63	7.12B	39	FIL	Filecoin
5			-1%		0.54	5.4B	46	ARB	Arbitrum
6			-1%		0.08	2.3B	42	CRO	Cronos
7				81%	66.8	994M	79	QNT	Quant
8					4.11	6.17B	16	DOT	Polkadot
9				59%	0.09	4.52B	34	XLM	Stellar
10				94%	62183.8	1.31T	1	BTC	Bitcoin
11				86%	1405.53	1.41B	58	MKR	Maker
12					62135.2	4.06B	9698	BTCB	Bitcoin BEP2
13					7.99	4.19B	26	ICP	Internet Computer
14					62055.5	9.34B	9695	WBTC	Wrapped Bitcoin
15					4.36	1.7B	49	ATOM	Cosmos
16					0.05	2.6B	9773	WHBAR	Wrapped HBAR
17					143.05	83.8B	5	SOL	Solana
18				29%	1.64	7.04B	41	OP	Optimism
19				70%	18.42	3.88B	32	ETC	Ethereum Classic
20				56%	26.5	19B	12	AVAX	Avalanche
21				75%	0.05	2.6B	45	HBAR	Hedera
22					1	121B	3	USDT	Tether USDt
23					1	494M	119	TUSD	TrueUSD
24					1	5.36B	19	DAI	Dai
25					1	35B	6	USDC	USDC
26					1.08	1.08B	67	LDO	Lido DAO
27					1	69.6M	457	BUSD	BUSD
28					5.21	26.6B	10	TON	Toncoin

So, there you have it, folks. Another week, another crypto rollercoaster ride. Remember, investing in crypto is not for the faint of heart, or the weak of stomach. It’s a volatile game, but hey, that’s what makes it so damn entertaining. Just don’t come crying to us when your portfolio is worth less than a used napkin. 😉