- DOGE (Dogecoin)
- $0.13: ⭐⭐⭐
- Up 10% because…memes? Janet Yellen wouldn’t get it. She probably thinks a Doge is something you wear to a fancy dinner.
- LINK (Chainlink)
- $11.41: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Solid performance for the OG oracle. Maybe it knows if those Reddit housing crash predictions are actually gonna pan out this time.
- SHIB (Shiba Inu)
- $0.00: ⭐⭐
- Woof! Another day, another attempt to make ‘fetch’ happen. It’s like that friend who keeps trying to convince you to go to that dive bar you hate.
- BTC (Bitcoin)
- $67877.05: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- The king stays winning, even if it means dragging the entire market along for the ride. Retirement plan, anyone?
- ETH (Ethereum)
- $2626.24: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Solid week for the silver medalist. It’s like the smart, stable sibling that everyone actually likes.
Janet Yellen’s out here warning about tariffs like we’re back in the orange-hued days of trade wars. Someone tell her the only tariffs people care about are the ones Temu slaps on their Doge-themed dog collars. Speaking of which, Doge is up 10%…because reasons? Meanwhile, this genius on Reddit just turned their life savings into a cool $54k with options. First one’s free, buddy. Next time try buying a vowel.
| Logo | 30D Change | 24H Change | Circulating | Price $ | Diluted Cap $ | Cap # | Symbol | Name | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 0 |  |
 |
+10% | 0.13 | 19.7B | 8 | DOGE | Dogecoin | |
| 1 |  |
 |
+4% | 0 | 11.1B | 13 | SHIB | Shiba Inu | |
| 2 |  |
 |
+3% | 11.41 | 11.4B | 15 | LINK | Chainlink | |
| 3 |  |
 |
+2% | 7.92 | 4.15B | 26 | ICP | Internet Computer | |
| 4 |  |
 |
+2% | 0.56 | 5.59B | 45 | ARB | Arbitrum | |
| 5 |  |
 |
+1% | 94% | 370.46 | 7.78B | 14 | BCH | Bitcoin Cash |
| 6 |  |
 |
+1% | 1.1 | 1.1B | 72 | LDO | Lido DAO | |
| 7 |  |
 |
+1% | 59% | 0.1 | 4.81B | 30 | XLM | Stellar |
| 8 |  |
 |
+1% | 158.82 | 2.93B | 29 | XMR | Monero | |
| 9 |  |
 |
+1% | 93% | 0.02 | 1.98B | 48 | VET | VeChain |
| 10 |  |
 |
+1% | 89% | 71.99 | 6.05B | 20 | LTC | Litecoin |
| 11 |  |
 |
+1% | 94% | 67877.1 | 1.43T | 1 | BTC | Bitcoin |
| 12 |  |
 |
+1% | 67854 | 4.43B | 9729 | BTCB | Bitcoin BEP2 | |
| 13 |  |
 |
+1% | 5.21 | 26.6B | 10 | TON | Toncoin | |
| 14 |  |
 |
+1% | 67745.3 | 10.1B | 9726 | WBTC | Wrapped Bitcoin | |
| 15 |  |
 |
7.44 | 7.44B | 23 | UNI | Uniswap | ||
| 16 |  |
 |
153.65 | 90.1B | 5 | SOL | Solana | ||
| 17 |  |
 |
70% | 19.15 | 4.04B | 31 | ETC | Ethereum Classic | |
| 18 |  |
 |
4.37 | 1.71B | 50 | ATOM | Cosmos | ||
| 19 |  |
 |
0.37 | 3.68B | 73 | MATIC | Polygon | ||
| 20 |  |
 |
77% | 0.35 | 15.6B | 11 | ADA | Cardano | |
| 21 |  |
 |
3.68 | 7.22B | 40 | FIL | Filecoin | ||
| 22 |  |
 |
2626.24 | 316B | 2 | ETH | Ethereum | ||
| 23 |  |
 |
596.63 | 87.1B | 4 | BNB | BNB | ||
| 24 |  |
 |
2625.24 | 25.6B | 9723 | stETH | Lido Staked ETH | ||
| 25 |  |
 |
4.23 | 6.38B | 16 | DOT | Polkadot | ||
| 26 |  |
 |
4.8 | 5.83B | 17 | NEAR | NEAR Protocol | ||
| 27 |  |
 |
56% | 27.58 | 19.7B | 12 | AVAX | Avalanche | |
| 28 |  |
 |
0.08 | 2.33B | 44 | CRO | Cronos |
The crypto market: where logic goes to die and memes become million-dollar ideas (sometimes). One thing’s for sure, it’s never boring. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to figure out how to short this so-called “housing bubble.” Wish me luck!