- DOGE (Dogecoin)
- $0.14: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- The people’s champ is down, but with a 22% 7-day gain, it’s still defying the odds. Maybe Elon’s building that rocket to the moon after all… or maybe he’s just tweeting from the bathroom again. Who knows with that guy?
- BTC (Bitcoin)
- $66877.32: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- The OG crypto is taking a nap, probably dreaming about its glory days before stablecoins and meme coins. Wake me up when we’re back at all-time highs… or when someone pays for a pizza with a fraction of a Bitcoin again.
- NEAR (NEAR Protocol)
- $4.66: ⭐⭐⭐
- NEAR, so far yet so…down 8% this week? Someone get this coin a map, because it seems lost in the digital woods.
- ETC (Ethereum Classic)
- $19.09: ⭐⭐
- Remember that time you bought a knockoff brand and regretted it? That’s ETC, the Diet Coke of Ethereum.
- XRP (XRP)
- $0.53: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Ah, XRP, the coin that can’t stop going to court and can’t seem to break free from its legal shackles. Will it pump? Will it dump? Tune in next week for another exciting episode of ‘As the World Su es’!
Goldman Sachs claims the decade of big S&P 500 gains is over, predicting a measly 3% annual return over the next 10 years. They say the party’s over, folks! Time to pack up your Lambos and find a new playground. Maybe those Beanie Babies my grandma collects will finally be a good investment… Or maybe, just maybe, this is the kick in the rear the crypto world needed to separate the Dogecoins from the, well, even worse coins.
| Logo | 30D Change | 24H Change | Circulating | Price $ | Diluted Cap $ | Cap # | Symbol | Name | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 0 |  |
 |
-5% | 4.66 | 5.67B | 17 | NEAR | NEAR Protocol | |
| 1 |  |
 |
-5% | 75% | 0.05 | 2.59B | 47 | HBAR | Hedera |
| 2 |  |
 |
-5% | 0.05 | 2.6B | 9797 | WHBAR | Wrapped HBAR | |
| 3 |  |
 |
-4% | 4.77 | 1.87B | 49 | ATOM | Cosmos | |
| 4 |  |
 |
-3% | 56% | 27.34 | 19.6B | 12 | AVAX | Avalanche |
| 5 |  |
 |
-3% | 70% | 19.09 | 4.02B | 30 | ETC | Ethereum Classic |
| 6 |  |
 |
-3% | 4.32 | 6.52B | 16 | DOT | Polkadot | |
| 7 |  |
 |
-3% | 54% | 0.6 | 3.7B | 46 | MNT | Mantle |
| 8 |  |
 |
-3% | 86% | 1170.68 | 1.18B | 72 | MKR | Maker |
| 9 |  |
 |
-3% | 94% | 357.04 | 7.5B | 15 | BCH | Bitcoin Cash |
| 10 |  |
 |
-3% | 81% | 64.69 | 963M | 86 | QNT | Quant |
| 11 |  |
 |
-3% | 0 | 10.6B | 13 | SHIB | Shiba Inu | |
| 12 |  |
 |
-3% | 2617.31 | 25.5B | 9713 | stETH | Lido Staked ETH | |
| 13 |  |
 |
-3% | 7.88 | 4.14B | 26 | ICP | Internet Computer | |
| 14 |  |
 |
-3% | 56% | 0.53 | 53.3B | 7 | XRP | XRP |
| 15 |  |
 |
-3% | 2618.68 | 315B | 2 | ETH | Ethereum | |
| 16 |  |
 |
-3% | 29% | 1.71 | 7.35B | 42 | OP | Optimism |
| 17 |  |
 |
-3% | 93% | 0.02 | 2.01B | 48 | VET | VeChain |
| 18 |  |
 |
-2% | 89% | 70.83 | 5.95B | 22 | LTC | Litecoin |
| 19 |  |
 |
-2% | 0.37 | 3.65B | 73 | MATIC | Polygon | |
| 20 |  |
 |
-2% | 588.8 | 85.9B | 4 | BNB | BNB | |
| 21 |  |
 |
-2% | 3.79 | 7.44B | 41 | FIL | Filecoin | |
| 22 |  |
 |
-2% | 157.93 | 2.91B | 29 | XMR | Monero | |
| 23 |  |
 |
-2% | 0.14 | 20.8B | 8 | DOGE | Dogecoin | |
| 24 |  |
 |
-2% | 1.15 | 1.15B | 71 | LDO | Lido DAO | |
| 25 |  |
 |
-2% | 66881.4 | 9.84B | 9716 | WBTC | Wrapped Bitcoin | |
| 26 |  |
 |
-2% | 94% | 66877.3 | 1.4T | 1 | BTC | Bitcoin |
| 27 |  |
 |
-2% | 66864.2 | 4.37B | 9720 | BTCB | Bitcoin BEP2 | |
| 28 |  |
 |
-1% | 0.58 | 5.83B | 39 | ARB | Arbitrum |
Overall, the crypto market is looking like that one friend who swore they could handle their tequila shots. Spoiler alert: They can’t. But hey, at least we’re entertained, right?