- STT (Statter Network)
- $0.64: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Holy moly, a 263% 7-day gain? Someone’s making bank while others are losing their shirts. This is like finding a winning lottery ticket in a dumpster fire. Is this the next Bitcoin? Probably not. But hey, at least it’s not FuboTV.
- UPP (Sentinel Protocol)
- $0.05: ⭐⭐⭐
- Down 40% in 24 hours and 34% over 7 days? Ouch. This coin is getting pummeled harder than a Jersey Mike’s sub in a Blackstone board meeting. Time to average down, or just accept your fate and move on. There’s always next year… or maybe not.
- ANT (Aragon)
- $3.01: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- A 48% 7-day gain followed by a 34% 24-hour drop? This coin is more volatile than a toddler on a sugar rush. Strap in, folks, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride. At least it’s not as bad as that FuboTV guy’s portfolio.
- RAY (Raydium)
- $5.27: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
- While other coins are playing limbo with the devil, RAY is holding relatively steady. It’s like the unflappable cool kid in the corner, watching the chaos unfold with a smirk. Maybe this is the mature, responsible investment we’ve all been looking for? Nah, probably not.
- ELON (Dogelon Mars)
- $0.0: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- With a name like Dogelon Mars, you know this coin is either going to the moon or crashing and burning in spectacular fashion. Down 11%? Consider it a fire sale. Buy the dip, or just watch from the sidelines as the degens send this pup to Mars… or the dog pound.
Amidst the rubble of today’s crypto crash, a glimmer of hope shines through. While some investors weep over their cancelled retirements thanks to FuboTV’s 85% nosedive (RIP, sweet prince of streaming), the savvy among us see a buffet of bargains. Just like Buffett hoarding his $320 billion, waiting for the market to hit rock bottom, today’s bear market offers an all-you-can-eat smorgasbord of discounted digital delights. Are you brave enough to buy the dip? Or will you join the chorus of whiners who YOLO’d their life savings into a meme stock and are now left with enough to maybe, just maybe, buy a Jersey Mike’s sub before Blackstone jacks up the prices?
| Logo | 30D Change | 24H Change | Circulating | Price $ | Diluted Cap $ | Cap # | Symbol | Name | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 0 |  |
 |
-40% | 0.05 | 25M | 832 | UPP | Sentinel Protocol | |
| 1 |  |
 |
-34% | 3.01 | 130M | 351 | ANT | Aragon | |
| 2 |  |
 |
-24% | 0 | 2.53M | 1606 | REV | Revain | |
| 3 |  |
 |
-23% | 50% | 0.64 | 64M | 749 | STT | Statter Network |
| 4 |  |
 |
-22% | 0.01 | 12.9M | 1135 | OPEN | Open Custody Protocol | |
| 5 |  |
 |
-19% | 99% | 0.25 | 99.2M | 424 | SOLO | Sologenic |
| 6 |  |
 |
-19% | 0.05 | 5.94M | 1307 | BRICK | r/FortNiteBR Bricks | |
| 7 |  |
 |
-14% | 0.39 | 107M | 508 | DAO | DAO Maker | |
| 8 |  |
 |
-14% | 0.79 | 110M | 387 | CTK | Shentu | |
| 9 |  |
 |
-14% | 0.09 | 9.32M | 1154 | OPTI | Optimus AI | |
| 10 |  |
 |
-14% | 0.3 | 329M | 197 | POLYX | Polymesh | |
| 11 |  |
 |
-14% | 0.02 | 16M | 960 | TSUKA | Dejitaru Tsuka | |
| 12 |  |
 |
-13% | 1.35 | 93.4M | 675 | EWT | Energy Web Token | |
| 13 |  |
 |
-13% | 99% | 0.05 | 50.3M | 613 | LOOKS | LooksRare |
| 14 |  |
 |
-12% | 5.27 | 2.93B | 63 | RAY | Raydium | |
| 15 |  |
 |
-12% | 0.25 | 250M | 330 | POWR | Powerledger | |
| 16 |  |
 |
-12% | 0.03 | 26.5M | 831 | NXRA | Nexera | |
| 17 |  |
 |
-12% | 0.01 | 1.74M | 1819 | VTS | Veritise | |
| 18 |  |
 |
-12% | 65% | 0 | 2.17M | 1786 | RFOX | RFOX |
| 19 |  |
 |
-11% | 0.02 | 29M | 1076 | XCHNG | Chainge | |
| 20 |  |
 |
-11% | 32% | 0.01 | 107M | 723 | GFAL | Games for a Living |
| 21 |  |
 |
-11% | 67% | 0.11 | 107M | 516 | RSS3 | RSS3 |
| 22 |  |
 |
-11% | 9% | 0 | 324M | 753 | VRA | Verasity |
| 23 |  |
 |
-11% | 0.19 | 130M | 4078 | MC | Merit Circle | |
| 24 |  |
 |
-11% | 79% | 0 | 2.07M | 1740 | FOR | ForTube |
| 25 |  |
 |
-11% | 0 | 190M | 405 | ELON | Dogelon Mars | |
| 26 |  |
 |
-10% | 100% | 0 | 29M | 782 | KIN | Kin |
| 27 |  |
 |
-10% | 67% | 0.14 | 28.4M | 909 | HARD | Kava Lend |
| 28 |  |
 |
-10% | 0.38 | 11.1M | 1084 | PPC | Peercoin |
So, there you have it, folks. The crypto market is a wild, wacky, and wonderful place where dreams are made and broken in the blink of an eye. Buy high, sell low, and always remember to blame someone else for your bad decisions. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to buy some more Bitcoin. Or maybe a bridge. I hear those are good investments.