- ARKM (Arkham)
- $2.12: ⭐⭐
- Down 1%? In this market? That’s practically a stablecoin. Congrats, Arkham, you’ve achieved the dizzying heights of mediocrity.
- UNIBOT (UniBot)
- $7.8: ⭐⭐⭐
- Up 4%? Not bad, UniBot. Not bad at all. Still probably less exciting than watching paint dry, but hey, we take our wins where we can get them in this clown fiesta.
- ORDI (ORDI)
- $40.24: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Flatlining today, ORDI? Must be taking a breather before the next inevitable rug pull. Don’t worry, the chaos will return soon enough. This is crypto, after all.
- BONK (Bonk)
- $0.0: ⭐
- Down 7%? Name checks out. Bonk went bonk. It’s the circle of life in the crypto savannah. Pour one out for our fallen comrade…or just buy the dip, whatever. No judgment here (mostly).
- BITCOIN (HarryPotterObamaSonic10Inu)
- $0.22: ⭐
- Down 9%? HarryPotterObamaSonic10Inu…the name alone screams ‘future blue-chip investment.’ Said no one ever. This is the kind of coin that makes you question your life choices. But hey, isn’t that every crypto nowadays?
Remember that dude on WSB who turned $1k into $1M then yolo’d it all on 2-day SPY calls? Yeah, that’s the energy in the crypto markets right now. Our baby cryptos are acting like they’re auditioning for a sequel to ‘Idiocracy,’ and MicroStrategy, bless their cotton socks, just dumped another $5.4 BILLION into Bitcoin. Is Saylor a genius or a regard? Place your bets, folks, because the clown show is just getting started. Oh, and Macy’s? Apparently, hiding $130M in expenses is easier than finding a matching sock in the dryer.
| Logo | 30D Change | 24H Change | Circulating | Price $ | Diluted Cap $ | Cap # | Symbol | Name | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 0 |  |
 |
-1% | 22% | 2.12 | 2.12B | 157 | ARKM | Arkham |
| 1 |  |
 |
0.05 | 6.08M | 1333 | BRICK | r/FortNiteBR Bricks | ||
| 2 |  |
 |
+4% | 100% | 7.8 | 7.8M | 1240 | UNIBOT | UniBot |
| 3 |  |
 |
+1% | 50% | 0.42 | 42M | 906 | STT | Statter Network |
| 4 |  |
 |
29% | 0.55 | 551M | 328 | NTRN | Neutron | |
| 5 |  |
 |
-8% | 63% | 0 | 14.4M | 1186 | BAD | Bad Idea AI |
| 6 |  |
 |
-2% | 96% | 0 | 329M | 230 | SNEK | Snek |
| 7 |  |
 |
-9% | 0.22 | 219M | 283 | BITCOIN | HarryPotterObamaSonic10Inu (ERC-20) | |
| 8 |  |
 |
100% | 40.24 | 845M | 108 | ORDI | ORDI | |
| 9 |  |
 |
-3% | 82% | 0 | 89M | 544 | LADYS | Milady Meme Coin |
| 10 |  |
 |
+1% | 3614.05 | 6.04B | 10012 | WBETH | Wrapped Beacon ETH | |
| 11 |  |
 |
33% | 0.6 | 596M | 298 | EDU | Open Campus | |
| 12 |  |
 |
-2% | 0 | 70.4M | 578 | AIDOGE | ArbDoge AI | |
| 13 |  |
 |
-11% | 0 | 34.5K | 2673 | PLAY | Play Token | |
| 14 |  |
 |
+2% | 0.2 | 602M | 293 | AGI | Delysium | |
| 15 |  |
 |
-3% | 0.01 | 130M | 416 | SDEX | SmarDex | |
| 16 |  |
 |
-6% | 0.14 | 143M | 1014 | UNS | UNS TOKEN | |
| 17 |  |
 |
+33% | 0.04 | 38.5M | 749 | NXRA | Nexera | |
| 18 |  |
 |
0.08 | 8.11M | 1242 | OPTI | Optimus AI | ||
| 19 |  |
 |
+3% | 4% | 0 | 32.2M | 1806 | HVH | HAVAH |
| 20 |  |
 |
+10% | 77% | 0.01 | 7.7M | 1339 | IMGNAI | imgnAI |
| 21 |  |
 |
43% | 1.07 | 2.25B | 94 | CORE | Core | |
| 22 |  |
 |
-1% | 32% | 0.01 | 106M | 769 | GFAL | Games for a Living |
| 23 |  |
 |
+3% | 27% | 0 | 49.4M | 1041 | NEXA | Nexa |
| 24 |  |
 |
86% | 0.14 | 139M | 405 | 0x0 | 0x0.ai | |
| 25 |  |
 |
-2% | 0.01 | 6.04M | 1805 | TOMI | tomi | |
| 26 |  |
 |
-3% | 0.01 | 991K | 1930 | GRV | Grove Coin | |
| 27 |  |
 |
-7% | 81% | 0 | 4.04B | 42 | BONK | Bonk |
| 28 |  |
 |
+5% | 57% | 0 | 19.2M | 1115 | RXD | Radiant |
The crypto market is currently experiencing a state of delightful absurdity. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions, ranging from ‘I’m going to be rich!’ to ‘I should have invested in Beanie Babies.’ So, strap in, HODL tight, and pray that your chosen shitcoin doesn’t spontaneously combust. Because in this market, anything is possible. Except making sense. That ship has sailed, sunk, and is now being used as an artificial reef for degens’ dreams.