John bet his life savings on Tesla vibes and lost This isnt investing its a casino where the house always wins Remember 2008? Same song different dance
Tesla stock soars on bad earnings? Classic Wall Street Bet against the masses they said Itll be fun they said Now everyone holding puts is crying in their ramen options shortsqueeze
Tesla missed earnings by 35? Stock goes up This markets a joke Dont be the punchline NoHashtagsJustPain
Teslas Q1 report: a dumpster fire wrapped in a shiny press release Revenue down profits tanked but the stocks up? Clown market confirmed No financial advice just morbid curiosity
Teslas profits tanked 71 Elons back to focus after playing with Dogecoin and Twitter Sure thatll fix it Remember Enron? History doesnt repeat itself but it often rhymes
