Featured image of post 2024-06-12  Regret City: Population - Your Crypto Portfolio

2024-06-12 Regret City: Population - Your Crypto Portfolio

Buckle up, buttercup, 'cause the crypto casino is open, and it looks like the house is winning again. We're diving into the latest crypto massacre, where gains are as rare as a sober WSB trader on a Friday.

  • CRE (Carry)
    • $0.00: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
    • This bad boy is up 283% in the past 24 hours! Either someone’s been playing fast and loose with the ‘buy’ button, or we’ve got a genuine unicorn on our hands. Time to chuck a couple bucks at it and see if it flies.
  • BZZ (Swarm)
    • $0.64: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
    • BZZ is buzzing alright, buzzing with mediocrity. Up 31% in 24 hours, but let’s be real, with a name like ‘Swarm,’ it should be absolutely stinging the competition. Instead, it’s more like a mild annoyance, like that fly that won’t stop circling your head.
  • BabyDoge (Baby Doge Coin)
    • $0.00: ⭐⭐
    • BabyDoge, you’re like the kid in school who tries to copy the cool kid’s homework but ends up with crayon scribbles. Maybe stick to being a meme and leave the actual trading to the grown-ups? You’re down 7% for the week, better ask mommy for a loan.

Elon Musk, the Dogefather himself, is threatening to unleash a Tesla-sized tantrum on Apple, banning their devices because…well, because it’s Elon. Apparently, he’s not a fan of Apple’s tight grip on OpenAI in iOS. I guess he’s decided to channel his inner toddler and scream, “If I can’t play with it, NO ONE CAN!” This might just be the push those Tesla calls needed to finally reach the dumpster behind Wendy’s.


Logo 30D Change 24H Change Circulating Price $ Diluted Cap $ Cap # Symbol Name
0 +283% 0 46M 647 CRE Carry
1 +60% 89% 0.01 873K 1933 WTC Waltonchain
2 +31% 83% 0.64 40.3M 745 BZZ Swarm
3 +25% 0.12 29.7M 850 MOB MobileCoin
4 +15% 28% 0.09 90.7M 822 AXEL AXEL
5 +15% 98% 0.75 36M 730 MNW Morpheus.Network
6 +14% 78% 2.83 79.9M 563 ELA Elastos
7 +13% 30% 0.01 531M 326 SURE inSure DeFi
8 +10% 74% 0.63 157M 406 SYN Synapse
9 +9% 0 374M 252 BabyDoge Baby Doge Coin
10 +8% 1.68 88.8M 470 GHST Aavegotchi
11 +8% 86% 0.24 237M 280 0x0 0x0.ai
12 +7% 23.75 2.37B 5745 VERI Veritaseum
13 +7% 0 2.61B 51 BONK Bonk
14 +7% 0.77 104M 438 CTK Shentu
15 +6% 100% 0 7.98M 1233 TABOO TABOO TOKEN
16 +6% 68% 0.22 218M 340 CQT Covalent
17 +5% 9% 0 387M 695 VRA Verasity
18 +5% 0.05 43.9M 666 STRX StrikeX
19 +5% 0.73 23.1M 1140 CRU Crust Network
20 +4% 73% 0.45 451M 185 ELF aelf
21 +4% 0.02 20.7M 898 GFT Gifto
22 +4% 53% 0 2.65M 1752 SSG SOMESING
23 +4% 0 11.6M 1108 EGG Nestree
24 +4% 0.27 133M 553 ALEPH Aleph.im
25 +4% 77% 0.04 147M 414 DAG Constellation
26 +3% 100% 0.24 28.5M 782 ZERC zkRace
27 +3% 80% 0.05 47.8M 697 CEEK CEEK VR
28 +3% 0.09 93.6M 476 POLY Polymath

So there you have it, folks. The crypto market: where fortunes are made and lost faster than you can say ‘rug pull.’ Remember, though, it’s all fun and games until someone loses an ETH…then it’s just hilarious. Happy trading, degens! 💎🙌 (Don’t actually remortgage your house for this.)

Made with the laziness 🦥
by a busy guy